Comments, Harassment, Spamming by the Liberals and Oppression – Is a female voter allowed an opinion?

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The original post referenced  can be found at: https://htheblog.wordpress.com/2015/09/13/an-open-letter-to-trudeau-and-mulcair-why-am-i-so-worthless/

The last few days have been both interesting and at the same time shown a disturbing side of a certain segment of our population. For those who haven’t been following, on September 13, 2015 I wrote a piece that was an open letter to Trudeau and Mulcair regarding the upcoming federal election in Canada. I wrote my feelings. I shared my feelings. After all it is better to pose concerns prior to an election rather than stay quiet and complain after. Essentially what I did is exactly the same as if I had been at a political forum and had been given the opportunity to pose a question or mention a concern.

I sent the piece to the federal headquarters of the NDP, the Liberals, and the Conservatives. I also sent the letter to  two Conservative candidates, two Liberal candidates and one NDP candidate in our area. A link was also posted on the Facebook page of each of the three political parties. I asked each recipient for a reply, the only replies I received were from the two Conservative candidates for our area. The Liberal’s refused to address the concern as did the NDP. Even at the riding level they refused to address a concern of their local people. Is the subject too hot, or do they just not care? All I know is that elected officials represent the people, and if they can’t even get back to you during an election they will be deaf to your concerns once they are sitting in office. No reply is a bad sign.

Now I need to expand on the reply because there is a little twist. When I emailed the Liberals what they did do was start spamming me with emails asking for money. To date I have received 20 emails spamming me but not one response to my concern. How could they ignore my concern yet spam me 20 times in the period of 12 days? Obviously my opinion holds some weight as I am sure they would have taken the time to counter-act my concerns seeing it was in a public forum.

(For the record, so I do not again end up being accused of being a “fake” or a “liar”, here are the titles of the emails I received, the first one was dated September 18th, 5 days after my piece was written: Now you have your say, Feeling Positive, Elections Cost Money, Your official 2015 donor card is ready. I know what it is like, Debra thank you, All stops, Catch this?, it felt great, you decide, mistake?, Real change, Live now: the Munk Debate on Canada’s Foreign Policy, Yes, Hands down, It’s about now, Momentum, NDP Attack Alert, Love this, and Hey.)

When I first sent out my blog post it went to about 11 locations. A few days later, as opportunities arose with Facebook linked news stories a couple more links were posted, probably on either CTV or Global news sites as those are the two news sources I follow in my feed. As I watched my stats for views they were pretty normal for a political piece, maybe a few hundred views over the first few days. I am not new to blogging, this piece had not been aggressively promoted online, it was a piece of my opinions and concerns related to the Liberal and NDP federal political parties.

On September 27, 2015 everything changed. Alerts started coming through on my phone regarding an increase in blog views. Someone somewhere had picked up my letter and shared it on line, clearly it struck a chord with them and they felt it needed to be shared. By September 28th the views increased, at midnight, for that day alone, the piece had been read 18,160 times on that day alone. Each day the reads increased, and while the vast readership was from Canada, the night time statistics showed the piece being read all over the world. People were reading. People continue to read. As I write this, over 63,000 people have read my open letter, a letter that was sent to a handful of sources.

Statistically, the letter being read is great. Sadly the required result, a response from the NDP or Liberal Party was not to happen. Clearly family does not matter to these parties, or stay-at-home/work-at-home parents, who I suspect the vast majority are women. Clearly I was worthless in the eyes of the NDP and the Liberals, otherwise they would have responded.

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The NDP and the Liberal’s may not have responded, but what I received instead was hate mail. First it was Facebook comments sent directly to me essentially telling me to “stop breeding like rabbits and get to work”. It was a classic unimaginative comment. Having a large family it happens all the time. In front of our children complete strangers have no problem saying “time to keep your legs shut” or “you should of had an abortion”. This is our society, this is the value mothers hold; or at least mothers of more than two or three children. We are targets, we are used to it, we are quite honestly bored with it. Comments that we receive simply show the other person’s insecurity regarding their own personal ability to raise a large family. In the grand scheme of things it is just another “Facebook poster” (yes, quotations!), everyone reading this knows what I mean.

However yesterday morning the really toxic people started to show their faces. Now remember my open letter was regarding my own personal thoughts and concerns, any other Canadian who really cared could also write their own open letters. Quite honestly if others took the time to write pieces we might hear more intelligent views on a whole range of issues rather than people just slinging insults on Facebook. But this is where everything began to get a bit interesting, and a little dark. People started to take offense that I dare have an opinion. They started to attack our family choice and size, our lifestyle choice (stay-at-home/work-at-home), they called me a liar, they called me a fake. One thing was very obvious in all the comments, these were comments meant to oppress a woman, they were comments that would never be said to a man. My husband sat in disbelief reading, and I didn’t even show him the worst, he had never quite seen anything like it.

At first it was comments and rants sent through to my comments section on the blog. Moderation is a wonderful thing, I have a “trash” button, it gets hit after I read the second negative thing in a comment. I’m too busy to waste my time reading other people’s rants and hate; if they really cared they would write their own piece and post it publicly. By mid-morning I simply closed the comments, I home-school  my five year old for Kindergarten (Kindergarten is optional in Alberta) , I had a shoot to do, I simply didn’t have the time or inclination to deal with other people’s toxic drama. Quite honestly I wasn’t the person they needed to talk to, from the tone, these people severely needed a therapist.

Last night everything moved to a new level when I received a toxic and attacking email from a complete stranger who decided to track me down. Attack me personally. What inspires a person to be so mean in response to an open letter? What inspires a person to try and bully a person, or should I say bully a woman, who has written an open letter? I will just give you a few choice words from the email, “blatantly dishonest”, “horribly ignorant”…..it gives you an idea of the tone. However beyond the playground name calling the male writer of the email suggests I should “publish a retraction” and that I am full of “misinformation”. This is the most troubling of anything included in the email because this person feels a woman has no right to an opinion, this man feels he has the right to track down a woman and bully her on line, and try to beat her into submission with words and insults. An email like the one I received would have never have been sent to a man, it goes to show there is still an attitude of heavy oppression towards women in our country. Sad. I however am not weak. I also recognize that an intelligent person would not have written so. An intelligent person would not try to suppress and oppress another person’s opinion. An intelligent person would have tried to contact the Liberal or NDP parties and said “Why don’t you talk to her?” But bullying was the preferred method of action.

So the question is how does one deal with this email? Well I certainly wasn’t going to issue a retraction apologizing for my own feelings, thoughts and concerns. I believe women in Canada still have a right to having their own thoughts; that has yet to be stripped from us. So I figured the best way to deal with a blowhard woman hater was to let him have his moment in the sun and I posted his email address on line. “Why?” you may ask. Public record. I want everyone to know who is harassing me, I also suspect he is harassing others as his email went in my “junk” file. It is cyber-bullying. It is harassment. It is also the way I will deal with any future emails of a similar nature. No person should face harassment or bullying for having an opinion regarding the federal election.

So I put this question to everyone, “Does a female in Canada have the right to an opinion, or is she simply worthless?”.

No longer is the subject only with regard to income splitting and Universal Child Care Benefit, it is now a question of the female population having a right to an opinion.

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Women make up close to half the population of Canadians. Women who choose to have children inevitably have to make alterations to their lives in order to give birth , this is a given. Even after birth, even though there are some stay-at-home dads, it is often the women who make the sacrifices to raise the children. They stay at home, they work from home, they work part time. There are stay-at-home moms with diplomas, degrees, masters and PHD’s. There are stay-at-home moms who walked away from careers as lawyers and doctors to raise their children. The simple act of giving birth does not mean women are stupid and worthless, it means we put family first. Somehow this has made us worthless. This has not just been demonstrated through proposed policy but also through “hate mail” and comments.

I hope everyone will reflect upon my comments, and reflect upon how you personally view the women in your life and those who are complete strangers. And please, if you see a woman being oppressed or demeaned, please watch out for her. This is a dark and slippery slope.

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Link: https://htheblog.wordpress.com/2015/10/01/trudeau-mulcair-fanboy-rats-stay-at-home-mom-out-to-saskatoon-police-force/

Update:

Remember the toxic email I received? Well the author went to the Saskatoon Police Department regarding this issue to complain about me. “Privacy Act”.

He attacked me through an unsolicited email, and posted libelous statements about me on his blog  calling me “blatantly dishonest”. I requested that the Saskatoon police officer contact an R.C.M.P. member in our city of Red Deer so that I could talk to them to know every thing is legitimate, after all how do I know if it isn’t just the author of the hateful email having a friend be the heavy. One phone call to our local police force is all I asked. A reasonable request. If we are going to “play by the book” I want to know everything is on the level. My request was not fulfilled.

The police officer was put out, then too busy,would not listen to my full story, then said she would call back.  She hasn’t.

She had no problem with him making a personal attack. She had no problem with the harassment. She had no problem with the libel. She had no problem with the cyber-bullying. She had no time for me. One has to wonder if I was treated this way because I am female. Would a male have been blown off? I’ll let you decide. Oppression. Worthless. The theme continues.

(In honoring the “privacy act”, as it obviously trumps harassment, cyber-bullying and libel in the interpretation of severity within the Saskatoon Police force, I decided to turn the text into a popular old-school children’s game. Grab your pencil and paper kids, we aim to entertain!)

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“L_i_h_on T_b_y” – _e_g_t_n_e_a_@_m_i_.com – why does my open letter threaten you so ?

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This link will give you some insight to the inspiration for this post: https://htheblog.wordpress.com/2015/10/01/comments-harassment-spamming-by-the-liberals-and-oppression-is-a-female-voter-allowed-an-opinion/

Update: L.T. went to the Saskatoon Police Department regarding this issue. He attacked me through an unsolicited email, and posted libelous statements about me on his blog  calling me “blatantly dishonest”. I requested that the Saskatoon police officer contact an R.C.M.P. member in our city of Red Deer so that I could talk to them to know every thing is legitimate, after all how do I know if it isn’t just L.T. having a friend be the heavy. The police officer was put out, then too busy, then said she would call back. She had no problem with him making a personal attack. She had no problem with the libel. She had no time for me. Interesting.

(This is a response to an email I received this evening.)

L. T., why does my letter to Trudeau and Mulcair threaten you so.

Why did you feel the need to track me down and send me an angry letter?

I am one person with an opinion.

Are you worried that the almost 57,000 people who have read my letter may stop and think before they vote?

L. T. it is fine for me to have my views, and it is fine for you to have yours. I suspect you are simply jealous that an average Canadian would reach out with their feelings about an election policy.

So L. T., I am about to give you a wonderful opportunity, for anyone interested in Leighton Tebay’s opinion please email them at ____________________ ( email removed but clearly people have been writing you or you wouldn’t have gone to the police like a big whinging baby!) .

(The real question is, is L. T. real, or just a coward hiding behind a gmail account? Time will tell. Enjoy your emails!)

Also, for everyone’s amusement, L.’s email went in my JUNK email folder. Any bets this is a troll for the NDP or Liberals? Hmmmmmm……..why would it go in the junk folder I wonder? Wonder, wonder, wonder……………….

(Same person? Who knows. Just another Google search. However it does fit the NDP or Liberal troll theory. Are they really so threatened as to attack a simple stay at home mom?) )

(graphic removed)*****

By the way….this graphic above stays….this is a public Google search…..no “privacy” issue here. First page of my Google search when I searched the email I received. Perhaps next I will have a police officer telling me  women are no longer allowed to use the internet.

**** Update: As of this morning, October 1st, 2015 L. T. has again sent me a harassing email. Evidently women are not allowed to have opinions on how they feel. We are to be oppressed. We are to be bullied. L. T. and all he stands for is oppression of women and bullying through emails. I encourage anyone else being bullied due to this election to stand strong, and consider actions like these when they vote.

***** Update: October 5, 2015 : I removed the graphic, on my own free will and decision,  of the subject of this post that appeared on the first page of my google search. I decided my blog’s quality was just being drug into the dirt by including images of this “man”. Undoubtedly everyone in this person’s circle knows what he is like, and the rest of Canada simply won’t care about a blowhard from Saskatoon. The blog post stays as it is part of the experience and story, and also part of the expanding story of free expression of opinion, cyber-bullying and harassment, and the equality of women. This situation has brought more than just political policy to light, it has shown a disturbing and oppressive side of Canadian society. The discussion has been opened and I hope more women will out those who try to bully or oppress them.

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17,800 views of my Mulcair/Trudeau Letter Today Alone

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I guess it pays to care.

I guess it pays to be vocal.

Today my concerns were heard by 16,609 people who care about Canada. Today my letter to Trudeau and Mulcair was read 17,800 times. The policies of Trudeau and Mulcair may make me feel worthless, but the tens of thousands of people who have taken the time to read my letter has made me feel that I am of some worth.

I thank you all for reading and sharing my letter.

The link to the letter can be found by clicking HERE .

daily stats sept 29 2015

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An Open Letter to Trudeau and Mulcair- Why am I so worthless?

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(Edited to add that as of October 24th, 2015 this letter had received 93,951 views and multiple incidence of hate mail – LINK for further post.)

Dear Justin Trudeau and Thomas Mulcair,

Why am I so worthless in your eyes? For weeks I have listened to election coverage and not only do your parties make me out to be worthless, not only do your parties offer me nothing, but you want to take away the mere meagre offerings the current government gives to our family.
Dear Mr. Trudeau and Mr. Mulcair, I am a stay-at-home mom and a work-at home mom. Our family has made sacrifices in order for our children to be actually raised and cared for by their parents rather than outsourced. We have put family first yet your parties see no value in this. When the Conservative government introduced the monthly Universal Child Care Benefit cheque, and included families like ours, we felt the government acknowledged the value stay-at-home parents provided to Canadian society. When the Conservative government introduced income splitting it was again proof that stay-at-home parents were a valuable asset. The Liberal and N.D.P. governments plan to strip these programs from us, the only programs that indicate stay-at-home parents are of any worth. We, the parents that have selflessly sacrificed everything for the well being of our families are worthless in your eyes.

Dear Mr. Trudeau and Mr. Mulcair, I am about to give you a tour of our life.

Our family is a family of seven, a mother, a father, and five children ranging in age from 5 to 17. We live in Red Deer, Alberta. We live in a 3 bedroom 1250 square foot house, it wasn’t always this size as it was originally 666 square feet in size. The house we bought for land value and spent years upon years renovating and adding onto the house; sweat equity. Sweat equity that has quadrupled the price of our house. We are hard workers. Our children share rooms. Our two oldest share an 8’x12′ room, while our youngest three share a 9×9.5′ room. We live modestly and compactly and within our means. We have stayed in a small home so that we could afford for one of the parents to stay home and raise and care for our own children. We believe if we choose to become parents we also choose to take on the responsibility to raise our own children and not outsource the responsibility.

I am also a work-at home mom. There are thousands upon thousands of work-at-home parents across Canada, we are a hidden and forgotten portion of the economy. Parents who work from home are making the best effort to bring in an income while raising children at the same time. The scope of stay-at-home parents is broad: dayhomes, music teachers, dance teachers, photographers, tutors, bookkeepers, hairdressers, crafters, growers, dog groomers…and the list goes on. We have no benefits, we often do not make anywhere near minimum wage, we work late into the night when children are sleeping, and we often receive little respect from society as they think we are working for “fun” or it’s a “hobby” or it is “good to keep your hand in your career”. The fact of the matter is we are working to support our families. We are often working for a pittance yet every five or ten dollars adds up. We are hard workers. Income splitting made this worthwhile. On our personal tax return we saw how financially worthless we were even though we were trying to do the impossible and run businesses and raise our own children at the same time, yet when income splitting was allowed we had some degree of value. The Liberals and N.D.P. parties want to strip us of this tiny value we can provide our family with at tax time.

I am now going to provide you with a couple of real numbers for what a work-at-home/stay-at-home parent makes. I run two home-based businesses, one is photography and one is naturally dyed hand-knits. Every so often you closely cost a job or two to see where the profit is and the viability of continuing with a product. A few years ago I did a costing on a large wedding package that I offered, and instead of just looking at the material costs I incurred compared to the price the customers paid, I also tracked every single hour involved in completing the job. The concept was to see what I was actually making if I were working for an employer rather than being self employed. Once all the calculations were completed, material costs, shooting, retouching, meetings, etc., I had made $3.00 an hour before tax on the job. But this wasn’t an isolated event. I recently did a tracking on a knit item that is popular in response to a 50% price increase overnight in material costs from my local supplier in Alberta , this happened shortly after the announcement of increased minimum wage from the Alberta N.D.P. government. The item I sell for $7.50 wholesale, the new material costs came in at $2.25, the item takes 1.5 hours to make and package, not including prep or dyeing time (impossible to calculate, too many variables). The outcome, I am making $3.50 per hour. (As an aside, my wool now comes from P.E.I., 25% the cost of Alberta wool including shipping, and beautiful quality.) My numbers are not out to lunch, I’ve actually run costings on Canadian Etsy sellers marvelling at how cheap they are selling their wares, they too are making a pittance. There are photographers in our area charging $5.00 sitting fees, again just trying to add to the family income. They are making a pittance trying to subsidize their family’s income while raising their children. Income splitting helped us, as did the Universal Child Care Benefit cheque. The Liberals and N.D.P want to strip us of this.

In the N.D.P. and Liberal’s eyes we are just lazy and decadent because we don’t “go out to work”. We are not “hard working Canadians”; we deserve nothing. The reality is stay-at-home parents make sacrifices to make it work all in the effort to raise the best Canadians possible. Families like ours learn to cutback to live within their budgets, have savings, or work towards a better future.

A few years ago we decided that investment in a property was going to give us a better financial return than the interest rate of G.I.C.’s , R.R.S.P.’s or Savings Bonds. We crunched the numbers and decided to make it work we had to make changes. We got rid of our second vehicle, subscriptions like XM radio and extra TV channels, our landline, hockey tickets and activities. I hunted for cheaper website hosting and went with a less expensive yellow pages ad. We started going to the swimming pool that is $10.00 per family instead of $20.00, and stopped going to sit down restaurants. We cutback to be able to make an investment for our future. We are not unique. There are many families with stay-at-home parents that make sacrifices to be able to raise their own families and have a secure future. Income splitting and the Universal Child Care Benefit cheque both acknowledge that we, the stay-at-home parent and work-at-home parent have some value.

Dear Mr. Trudeau and Mr. Mulcair, have you ever thought about the other value the stay-at-home parent provides to society? Let me list a few:

1) We are the ones at the school when they need volunteers . We go on field trips, help with track meets, tie skates, help with swimming, and aid with school lunches.

2) We are the ones that will keep the children home from school when they are sick. Our kids are not infecting a whole class of children and this inevitably saves on healthcare dollars in the long run.

3) We have the time to feed our children well, we have time to cook from scratch, and some of us even grow our own food. We have the time to invest in the well being of our children and combat child obesity. Again we are lessening the strain on healthcare dollars.

4) Many of us choose to transport our children to school personally, we like the safety aspect and we have the time to do so. We are saving the school systems money allocated for busing children to and from school.

5) We do not have “latch-key” children roaming the streets and falling under bad influences . This will inevitably save on healthcare dollars plus dollars spent on the criminal system long term. I think you will find many stay-at-home parents were “latch key” kids themselves, they realize how damaging the lack of parental involvement and supervision was, how badly things could have gone, and they want better for their own children.

In closing, Dear Mr. Trudeau and Mr. Mulcair;

Could you please tell me why you think I am so worthless?

Could you please tell me why those who go out to work are the only ones that matter?

Why are you penalizing me for putting my family first?

Why are you penalizing me for making sacrifices so that I can take care of my family ?

Why is a mom who goes out to work to pay for a McMansion of more value than a mother that chooses to raise and care for her very own children?

Dear Mr. Trudeau and Mr. Mulcair, what could your parties possibly do for me other than strip me of the little I gain from any government program?

*** Edited on September 30th, 2015 to add: 

As a side note, readers may be interested to know for 7 years I worked outside the home and utilized childcare. I have seen the situation from both sides and realize just how important it is for parents to be there for their children. As a child I was a latch key kid, my mom was a teacher, at age 9 you were given the key to the house and you were on your own. It was a negative experience with lasting effects.

Our children deserve the best start to their lives, and that is spending a maximum amount of time with one of their parents. Parenting does not stop when a child enters school, if anything a child’s life becomes more complex as they age and experience outside influences. When we choose to have a child we should also be making a choice to parent our children, nurture our children and be accessible to our children. No government institution can replace the experience that a parent can give a child. If we as a society no longer value hands on parenting, we have simply turned the female population into breeders. I personally want to live in a society formed by parents, rather than one of breeders and state institutions raising our children.

*** Edited on October 1, 2015 to add a follow up link regarding a dark response to my letter: https://htheblog.wordpress.com/2015/10/01/comments-harassment-spamming-by-the-liberals-and-oppression-is-a-female-voter-allowed-an-opinion/

**** Edited on October 1, 2015 to add: you know you’ve arrived when a Mulcair-Trudeau fan boy rats you out to police. Link: https://htheblog.wordpress.com/2015/10/01/trudeau-mulcair-fanboy-rats-stay-at-home-mom-out-to-saskatoon-police-force/